My husband’s “Jeff Foxworthy” voice: If you have indoor plumbing, but you make the males in your house pee outside in the compost, you might be a homesteader. If the chicken you’re eating for dinner has a name, you might be a homesteader. If you have a state-of-the-art dryer, but you insist on drying your clothes outside, you might be a homesteader. If you have longer conversations with your poultry than you do with your spouse, you might be a homesteader (he’s so jealous).
My husband is a natural born comedian and he likes to poke fun at some of the homestead-y things we do. It prompted me to ask my friends on Twitter, how do you know when you’re a homesteader?
You might be a homesteader if…
… watching chickens is preferable to watching television.
… you collect chickens and ducks like other collect knick-knacks.
… you upcycle and reuse everything until you are confident it’s been used to the max.
… you are in the produce section of the grocery store and you think, would my geese like this?
… if you think I can’t finish all of this, will my chickens or sheep eat it?
… baking bread with your favorite duck is considered completely normal.
… you’re constantly apologizing for the bits of hay and straw in your family car.
… planning your garden requires a dozen books geared towards maximizing space and harvest.
… you have to walk outside to get your breakfast.
… your muck boots are your favorite shoes
and you have globs of unidentifiable schmutz stuck under, around and on your shoes at all times.
… your friends know that they’ll need to the dogs, then the goats, before they can get near your house.
… your french tip manicure is actually just dirt under your nails. And you rock it.
… you forgot your sheep are still out in the yard and you have to pick them up and run them to the barn during a lightening storm.
… you are a master barterer. Chicken eggs in winter are like gold in the trading world.
… you love making a ‘weed salad’ to eat with lunch, of edible plants.
… your 8 year old’s favorite game is figuring out where the hens are hiding their eggs this week.
… you see things in a store and immediately begin figuring out how you can DIY it.
… you pull your jeans out of the laundry and find random vegetables in the pockets.
… if you frequently find eggs in your pockets while you’re out and about.
… you head to the backyard instead of the grocery store when you run out of eggs or milk.
How do YOU know if you’re a homesteader? Join in the tweet:
Finish this sentence: “You might be a #homesteader if…”
— The 104 Homestead (@104homestead) October 6, 2015